


Welcome to the Panic Room

by LethalBookshelves



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Connor Deserves Happiness, Father-Son Relationship, Fluff, Gen, Good Parent Hank Anderson, Hurt/Comfort, Protective Hank Anderson, connor def tried to use that led talking stuff in this scene u cant change my mind, for like a hot second, mmm we get hugs, no beta we die like men, not meant to be shippy but you can see it how u want, this is the saddest y'all will ever get from me lmao
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-13
Updated: 2018-08-13
Packaged: 2019-06-27 00:03:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,858
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15673962
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LethalBookshelves/pseuds/LethalBookshelves
Summary: Connor doesn't want to shoot Chloe, even though all his programming is fighting for him to just pull the damn trigger. Yet, he doesn't shoot her. Why doesn't he? The question makes his head spin and he feels too much emotion to contain it anymore.Hank tries to help him as much as he can, even as a shoulder to cry on.





	Welcome to the Panic Room

**Author's Note:**

> honestly this chapter was a missed opportunity for hugs and so now im fixing it

Even though Connor was built to make decisions like this easy, he’s finding this situation anything but easy. He and Hank had drove all the way to Kamski’s place for information, and now he has a gun in his hands and is being told to shoot the small blonde android for information. Connor did his research on Elijah Kamski before arriving, but with the man’s reclusive personality, Connor wasn’t able to fully understand how he worked. Apparently he’s the type of person who would willingly sacrifice his own precious android—something he created—for the sake of a test.

“Pull the trigger—” Kamski puts his hand on Connor’s shoulder, and at this point Connor’s internal systems are fighting against themselves.

“Connor! Don’t.” Hank shouts from his other side, and Connor doesn’t know what to do.

“—and I’ll tell you what you wanna know.”

_What to do? What do I do? The mission? Chloe?_

 

[O] Shoot  
[X] Don’t shoot

 

Connor doesn’t have a clear answer; ever since he’d started working with Lieutenant Anderson on deviant cases, he’d been feeling odd. It was odd enough that he was _feeling_ . He was not programmed to feel things that don’t aid to the investigation. And yet, he liked dogs. He felt happy petting Sumo. He couldn’t shoot the deviants at the club. He saved Hank instead of pursuing the deviant. He was _scared_ up on Stratford Tower. A flaw in his code?

…

Deviancy?

He stops his train of thought there, coming back to the present, where he is still pointing a gun at Chloe, who sits innocently at his feet. He tries to read her, but if she was feeling anything at all she was good at obeying orders. She doesn’t even shake. Connor’s hand is trembling. Hank wouldn’t want him to shoot Chloe. But Connor could practically see Amanda’s disapproving stare if he chose to give up a chance to learn more about deviants.

As a last attempt, he tries to communicate with her using the LEDs. _Are you scared?_

She doesn’t reply, doesn’t even flinch at his talking. She continues to stare at him, eerily silent. _Please. Tell me. I don’t want to shoot you if you don’t want to be shot._ What is he doing, really? Chloe didn’t seem like she cared at all. Just a simple machine following orders. Like he should be.

Yet Connor still can’t get himself to pull the trigger.

He can feel the weight of too many pairs of eyes on him as he stares down at Chloe’s kneeling body. Is she scared? Connor had been scanning her since the gun was placed in his hand, and he could see her stress levels steadily rising. She must be scared, even if only a little. Maybe if he shoots her Kamski will place her in another body, like Connor was after he fell of the apartment building saving the little girl for his first mission. Maybe—

_Don’t shoot her._

Connor barely manages to stop his jolt at a new message coming to his LED. It sounds like Chloe, but the Chloe his gun is aimed at still has a steady blue light. It must be one of the Chloe’s still in the pool behind him.

[O] Shoot  
[X] Don’t shoot

_Don’t shoot her. Please._

And that’s all it takes.

 

**[X] Don’t shoot**

 

With a shaky exhale, Connor hands the gun back to Kamski.

**SOFTWARE INSTABILITY ^^^**

* * *

 

He barely hears Kamski’s cryptic message about an emergency exit; everything seems muted yet too loud all at once. He focuses on Hank’s hand on his shoulder, leading him outside the building. Even without the messages, he wouldn’t have shot her. He knew that already, but why? Why was it so hard to follow orders? The snow whips around him and Hank as they step outside, and Hank’s hand falls from his shoulder. Connor misses it already.

“Why didn’t you shoot?” The inevitable question. There was a 95% chance of Hank bringing up what he did, yet he had hoped for that improbable 5% that he wouldn’t.

“I don’t know.” Connor answers honestly. “I don’t _know._ I gave up a valuable way to get new information, yet I failed.”

“You didn’t _fail,_ Connor.” Hank huffs, sounding both annoyed and proud at the same time. “You showed empathy. You put yourself in her shoes. That’s not something to call a failure.”

“But I’m a machine!” Connor exclaims, catching Hank by surprise, “I shouldn’t have done that! I’m supposed to be accomplishing my mission to the best of my abilities. I shouldn’t have felt anything looking at her, but I did! I’m a failure.”

Hank had been silent up until that point, letting Connor ramble until he felt okay again, but that last sentence got him worked up. “Connor! You aren’t a failure! You saved that girl’s life. I know you can feel things, kid, I’m old but not blind.”

“I can’t feel things. Only deviants can feel. And I am not a deviant!” Connor’s voice was getting desperate, and he was breathing rapidly, gulping down air like he was dying. Androids breathed, but its only purpose was the cool down internal machinery (which was what he needed) but they could go days, or even weeks without breathing if necessary. “I’m not a deviant…” His body had been shaking since he started talking, and warnings flashed left and right.

**STRESS LEVELS: 67%**

** > BODY TEMPERATURE RISING**

Connor’s knees failed him, and he crumpled down into the snow.

“Connor! Hey, are you okay, son?” Hank’s surprise turned into worry quickly, and he hurried over to where Connor knelt on the ground, not unlike how Chloe was not 5 minutes prior. The lieutenant grasped his shoulders again, and Connor was thankful for something to focus on. His mind was wandering, but Hank’s presence was solid. “Talk to me, what’s going on? How can I help?”

“I’m not a deviant. I can’t be.” The android doesn’t register Hank’s words, instead continuing to ramble. “I wasn’t built to become deviant. I was programmed to hunt deviants, to kill them. If I turn deviant they will disassemble me and try to figure out why I failed, and I can’t let that happen—”

His words were speeding up along with his shallow breaths, and Hank looked like he both wanted to shake some sense into him and give him a hug. Fortunately for him, Hank decided on the latter. With the hands he still had on Connor’s shoulders, he tugged him forwards until Hank had his arms fully around Connor’s shaking frame. Wow, if you had told Hank not even a month before that he would be comforting an android he would have laughed and then flicked you off. “Hey, hey, Connor, listen to me. You aren’t going to have to do any of that. I won’t let them lay a finger on you, okay?” Hank’s large hands run up and down the android’s back soothingly, complete with soft shushing sounds and murmurs.

The snow had melted through both of their trousers, but they didn’t pay it any mind. Connor’s shoulders started shaking even more, and Connor realized he was crying. For the first time since his creation. Not that he was alive for long… Alive… That was weird to think about. And if Cyberlife found out about this, his tendency to feel things, he would die.

“Connor, I know you’re thinking some fucking horrible things right now. Your LED is flashing red. I need you to stop thinking for a little bit, can you do that for me, son?” Hank’s voice was soft, and it took all of Connor’s energy to remove his face from where he had buried it in Hank’s jacket. His vision was blurred with his tears, and he tried to blink them away but more just kept coming. It was frustrating, and he wanted to wipe them away but couldn’t bare to let go of Hank’s shirt.

The older man reached up with one hand and wiped the tears for him, the motion comforting. “Connor. It’s alright to feel emotions. It’s alright to be deviant.” His stare makes Connor close his mouth where he was going to argue. “I would never, _never,_ let Cyberlife—or anyone!—take you away from me, got it?” Connor hiccups.

Now Hank’s hand is running through Connor’s soft synthetic hair, and Connor feels… safe. It’s not like him to have such reactions. But… it feels nice. “Now, I need you to listen to me and I don’t want you to argue with me. Understand?” A small nod. “I’ve known for a while now that you could feel things. For someone who talks so much about accomplishing your mission, you’ve let a lot of things slide. Back up on Stratford Tower, you told me you were _scared._ And even I could tell that whole thing really spooked you out. And don’t think I didn’t notice you backing away from the edge; you’re scared of heights. I’ve heard about your first mission, and I’m here to tell you it’s _okay._ ”

The tears have mostly stopped now, and Connor can see Hank clearly. A quick scan tells him that Hank is worried, proud, anxious, and happy. So many emotions all at once. How do humans feel so much all the time and not overheat?

The snow was stacking up on Hank’s shoulders and hair. Connor realized Hank must be freezing, staying in the snow like this. “Lieutenant—”

“Hank.”

“...Hank, I’m fine now, it’s too cold for you. We have to get somewhere warmer—”

“Who gives a fuck about me right now? You were crying, Connor. You should take care of yourself more, and don’t give me that bullshit about being a machine and not needing to or I will slap you.” Hank’s tone was dead serious, and it made Connor laugh. Hank’s subsequent look of offense only made him laugh harder.

The android is wheezing when Hank says, “Connor, I think you’ve lost it.”

There are tears in his eyes again, but now they’re tears of happiness that he had someone like Hank to confide in. Connor shakes his head, smiling softly as he looks back up at Hank, his LED circling a bright blue. Hank’s breath catches; he’d never seen Connor smile to wholeheartedly before. It was a sight to behold.

“Thank you, Hank. I really needed that.”

Hank shakes his head in dazed amusement, “Don’t even mention it, kid. I’ll always be there to help you—oof!” He’s knocked backwards as Connor launches himself at him. Hank’s arms flail around like pinwheels before he’s laying on his back in the snow, the cold already melting into his clothes. Now he has a newly deviant android in his arms, and you can see the moment where Hank goes ‘fuck it’ and just accepts this as his new life.

Connor’s decided to bury his face back into Hank’s chest, and even though he tries to hide it, Hank can see him smiling. Hank’s lips turn up to match, and he returns to running his hands through Connor’s hair. His ass was frozen, but he was pretty content with life at that moment.

**Author's Note:**

> when i first saw elijah my brain was like 'hot damn' and then he handed connor the gun and i felt so betrayed. like wow i can't believe i thought you were hot.
> 
> title is from au/ra's song 'panic room'
> 
> also, it's canon that connor is afraid of heights if he falls off the apartment building in the first scene to save the little girl!


End file.
